After a number of months struggling with headaches, I finally decided to find out what was causing them. There were many natural circumstances including the stress of living abroad that I thought might be contributing to the problem. The weather also received the blame on a number of occasions. I have to confess that I thought Roy might be responsible too. I think that is pretty typical for a cross-cultural marriage whether you’re the one living on foreign soil or you both are.
As I opened my bleary eyes this morning and stretched out my arm to read the time on my itouch I realized that my eyesight was probably the problem. I either needed a new longer arm, or I needed new glasses. How many times do we get a headache in marriage? We blame our spouse, we blame the stress we are under, we blame our circumstances but perhaps we just need a fresh perspective. It is possible the way we view our spouse has changed over time and we need new lenses to see correctly. Don’t allow the enemy to warp your view. It’s important to have a vision beyond the present circumstances.
In tough times it’s important to have a vision beyond the present circumstances Click To Tweet
Disappointment, blame, lack of trust and criticism can skew our vision and can make us wonder why we found our spouse attractive. We get a new perspective! When we release the disappointment we are in a much better place to work on the relationship. When we stop blaming it’s easier to let go of anger. When we trust God to bring healing then we stop trying to fix it ourselves with a sharp tongue or criticism.
A visit to the optometrist always involved trying different lenses and finding the specific problem which needs to be corrected. Wearing a new pair of glasses gives us a new appreciation of our environment. Wearing a new pair of glasses in marriage gives us a new appreciation of our spouse. It is time to see them how God sees them. We need to allow him to be the optometrist.
“For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways,” says the Lord. “For as the heavens are higher than the earth, So are My ways higher than your ways, And My thoughts than your thoughts.” Isaiah 55:8-9
by Lainey Hitchman
